Addiction and Divorce Statistics

However, this does not not necessarily mean their followers adhere to these tenants. Often, there is not just one factor resulting in a marriage ending. Couples may face many problems, as these divorce statistics show. If you’d like to know more of the story of our alcoholic marriage and our progress in relationship recovery, please download our new e-book, He’s Sober.

If a court determines that safeguards are no longer necessary, it will relax them, either gradually or immediately, depending upon the circumstances. New Beginnings is designed for educational purposes only and is not intended to give medical advice. The information provided by New Beginnings through phone, email or web support should divorce after sobriety not be used for diagnosing or treating any physical or mental health condition or disease. If you have or suspect an alcohol or drug problem, you should consult your health care provider right away. One of the greatest challenges in the relationships of life comes in the form of a spouse who is abusing drugs and alcohol.

Learn about substance use disorder

Recovery from substance use disorder can cause many changes in your marriage — not all of them positive. Fortunately, resources, such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline, are available if your safety is at risk. An interventionist can be beneficial in helping your spouse seek treatment, especially alongside family members and close friends. If you suspect your spouse may be abusing drugs or secretly misusing drugs, talk to them about your concerns before their addiction escalates. However, talking to them about the subject can be difficult, so setting up an intervention.

Offering to stop cheating on her with my liquid lover wouldn’t do anything to fix the pain of the years of betrayal. Jeff describes a good relationship with his adult children, as well as amiable communication with his ex-wife. The divorce also led to some changes in his daily life, such as achieving a long-desired dream to move to a rural area, purchasing property with a pond that’s richly populated by birds.

How alcoholism affects a marriage

There are so many things wrong with that declaration and question I shouted at my wife on several sober occasions before I relapsed and returned to active alcoholism. “This therapist has been really a staunch and encouraging support, just an extremely positive influence, helping me get through some of the past issues,” he said. At Jeff’s worst, during a pandemic video call with friends in 2020, he acknowledged that he was experiencing suicidal thoughts. That’s because codependency is a relationship trait and condition that’s independent of the substance use itself. In other words, it continues even when the substance use has stopped. It may require an intentional and lengthy process for both partners to learn how to rebuild trust within the relationship.

It seemed like the bottom kept dropping.” Ted worked hard to maintain his sobriety, and after many months of AA meetings, he asked Angie to go to counseling with him. Ted worked to rebuild Angie’s trust and diligently worked the 12 steps in his AA program. Eventually, they remarried each other and Ted is now 12 years sober. “I didn’t even think about having a drink at my daughter’s wedding,” he proudly tells me. The alcoholic may not realize they have a problem or may be reluctant to admit it exists. Divorce is a final legal end to a marriage, but divorce statistics show that couples sometimes want to be married again to each other after formally dissolving their union.

Step 3: Plan For New Living Arrangements

The therapist also encouraged him to remain open to new possibilities, including possibly a romantic partner—not an easy step to take on the cusp of his sixth decade. But while these life changes can be influential, demographic research has identified broad similarities for why marriages break down regardless of age, Cichy said. For instance, people who have been divorced once are more likely to divorce again, she said.

I didn’t understand that my wife wasn’t much in the mood for a congratulatory party. Sobriety meant only a chance that new pain wouldn’t be added to the pile. Sobriety did nothing to address the hell into which my disease had transformed her life. When a man stops cheating, it doesn’t erase the pain of the past indiscretions. Amid the grief surrounding a divorce, therapists should remain aware that not everyone in the family is necessarily on the same timeline, Hughes said. One parent may have quickly moved on, including finding a new partner, and wants the children—whether they’ve left home or are still living with one of their parents—to embrace their newfound happiness, she said.